“Through the blur, I wondered if I was alone or if other parents felt the same way I did – that everything involving our children was painful in some way. The emotions, whether they were joy, sorrow, love or pride, were so deep and sharp that in the end they left you raw, exposed and yes, in pain. The human heart was not designed to beat outside the human body and yet, each child represented just that – a parent's heart bared, beating forever outside its chest.”
― Debra Ginsberg
I’ll tell you what I know, and I suspect you already know it all yourself, no one is ever quite ready to be a parent; we think we are, and we have a feeling we’ll have it all figured out but, truth is, everyone is always caught off guard.
From the moment your baby breathes life in your womb to when we send them off to school, soccer practice or college, or when we’re waiting them to come home from their first date or say the “I do” to the one they choose – parenthood chooses you. It's not a question of choice but a matter of luck – you are blessed, and it’s up to you to juggle all the balls that are up in the air.
I am the mother of three gorgeous children; never in life have I thought I’d have three pieces of priceless jewels like they are, nor did I ever imagine I’ll know how to handle it all. They say I am an amazing mum but I still have my doubts (somehow, it always feels like it’s not good enough, right?).
All three of my kids are lessons in disguise and I would never trade this glorious experience for anything in this world!
Here, a quick sum up of things parenthood has taught me:
Patience, patience, patience
You know all those times you were dieting when you were young and someone tells you “just be patient, the results are going to show soon” but you still go crazy and quit or cheat with a slice of cake, anyways? Well, in parenthood – it’s all about limitless patience with no cheat day! Every single day is a new test on the battlefield and you need all the composure in this world to make it through.
After reading a few articles on www.amotherfarfromhome.com and based on my personal experience I've learned to wait for the right moment, use the right tactics, figure out when to strike to bend them to my will, how long to wait before I talk to them when they are mad, how well to postpone the anger (oh, yes, there’s plenty of anger in parenthood), ways to teach and educate them on life and have them listen, without having a door slammed to my face, etc. Patience!
Giving, in every sense of that word
Limitless giving, the type I never knew I was capable of; emotional, mental, financial, you name it. Once your child is born, everything else becomes second place, no matter how important it was up until then. You adjust yourself to their needs and find ways for their desires to happen. From always showing them how loved, worthy, appreciated and special they are to letting them indulge in their favorite clothing on a website like this one www.swap.com/shop/baby-apparel/ or their latest Frozen toys (and whatnot) – it’s all about selfless, endless giving. And then – once you do, figuring out ways not to spoil them. Ah… so much planning and strategies, it’s like running a country, really!
Playing hard to get
No, no… none of the games we used to play with our now-husbands even compare in wisdom and cleverness to the hard to get we play with the kids every day! It’s all about careful conditioning – do this and you’ll be rewarded that; if you’re a good girl, we’ll buy you that; you can’t have a sleepover unless you clean your room seven days a week straight, etc. It takes strength but they’re taught lessons that way. Strategies are everything! Believe it or not, but all the strategies I’ve used on my kids I’ve later implemented on my work when I returned to the office. Guess what? I’ve been nailing it since!
Parenthood is hard, demanding and glorious – all at the same time; if I had to do it all again, I would still want my same three amazing daughters - through laughter, prayers, tears, and blessings… and everything that is yet to come.