Remembering Isaac

Isaac had to be born early, I was really ill and he was born by c section on august 10th 2010. He weighed just 1lb 13oz and i saw him for just a few seconds before he was taken to neonatal intensive care.

I couldnt see him for 3 days because he got moved to a different hospital and i wasnt well enough to be moved. The first time i saw him after that is something i will always remember. He was so so small and had so many wires and tubes, but he was beautiful. He was perfect. He had all his fingers and toes and lots of hair, so so much hair. They said he may not have hair or fingernails or eyelashes yet but he did. He was absolutely perfect, just very very tiny.

We spent lots of time with Isaac, he didnt really like to be touched too much and was too ill to hold but we sat and talked to him and told him all about his family who all were longing to meet him.

Isaac couldnt stay with us. He was just too small and when he got ill he couldnt cope so needed the ventilator longer. And he was too small so the ventilator damaged his lungs. It was a vicious circle. 20 days after his birth, Isaac had a cyst on his lung that popped. The doctors tried but Isaac was too tired. He had had 2 operations and countless medical procedures in his little life and he needed to go to sleep.

That day we go to hold him, we had waited what seemed so long to do that. We bathed him and got to dress him for the first time.
All these things i will remember forever. Isaac is imprinted on my heart and will always be his mummy.